Dirty Money

It's kind of funny how most of the stories I post to my blog, inevitably lead back to my adventures, and experiences of working at CLC, the local Christian bookstore I've been with for seven years. This is a story involving Scott A., a staffer that was with us for about 4 years. The story begins with a heavy-set black woman entering our store and perusing the various Christian diet books that promise instant salvation along with instant weight loss, which by the way, is a curious combination of loss and gain. Anyway, after browsing the diet books and holy cookbooks for about 20 minutes, she finally brings her purchases to the counter. Now this is where it gets a little interesting. Scott finishes ringing her up, and tells her her total. Maybe it was $10 dollars, maybe it was $20...doesn't really matter. It's what she does next that does matter. She calmly and purposefully reaches into her shirt, aggressively poking around under her bra, until she comes out with a slighty disheveled $50 dollar bill. Then, with a face straighter than an arrow, she says to Scott, "You don't mind a little titty money, do you sweetheart...oh, and can you break a fifty?!" Now sometimes I might sat this in jest, but this time I really thought Scott was going to have a coronary right there on the spot. I was poised to take over just in case, but Scott managed to finish the transaction without any medical emergencies, something that seemed inevitable for a few minutes there. Oh, the good times we have at CLC, and how I shall miss them when I leave.

Stuck!

This is actually a retelling of a story that happened to me a couple winters back here at CLC when there was about a foot of snow and ice covering pretty much all of South Jersey. I woke early enough to get myself to work on time knowing it was going to be a very slow drive. I even called our area supervisor that morning just to see if he even wanted us to open the store, considering the road conditions. Thankfully, I managed to eventually make it to the store with a few minutes to spare. BUT, that was when the excitement began. As soon as I put the key in the door, and started to pull the door open, I realized I had a problem. Because of the build up of ice and frozen snow in front of the door, I was only able to open the door about 6 inches, however, the alarm goes off once the door is opened even an inch. So now the alarm is going off, and I can't get through the door to reset the alarm that is only about 4 feet inside the entry. Panicking, I tried to squeeze through the narrow opening to get to the alarm to shut it off. BIG MISTAKE...I got stuck half-way through the opening, and couldn't even budge the door. So now I am stuck half in the store and half outside the store with the burglar alarm blaring across the parking lot. That was embarrasing enough, but THEN the police show up to arrest the idiot who got stuck in the doorway of a Christian bookstore while trying to make off with a load of Bible Bars! It took about five minutes and some creative explaing to get out of that one. Oh the memories.... ;-P